WHAT THE STARS AND THE SKY TELL ME ABOUT LIFE

Every time there is an overnight activity for all Stargazers’s Society members, I always feel excited. Of course, I will be with my classmates and friends for the whole night. We can talk for each other, play simple games, and have all the moments to be treasured for the rest of our lives.
Before I go to school for the overnight, I went home and pack up my things. I make it a habit to bring my blue rosary every time I go out the house. So I put it on my pocket. I was hurrying at that time because my friends already called me up on the phone. I said goodbye and goodnight at everybody who is left at home. After, I stepped out the house.
While I was on the jeepney, taking a ride going to the UPHS campus, I was thinking- what if my friends don’t care for me? What if when I arrive there, I will be out of the group?
Finally! I was there! I entered the gate and the guard welcomed me. He asked for my permit slip. After, I looked for my friends. Then I saw them taking some pictures as a remembrance. My friend, Janelle, took me a shot as she saw me. They were all shouting and welcomed me with their smiles and jokes. Irene said that I will be sleeping beside her. Then, another classmate came and shared to me her big pack of chips. I was silent and still at that time, and Janelle thought that I got angry at her. But I wasn’t really angry at her. The truth is I was just thinking of my father at that time because he wasn’t feeling well when I went out the house. But later, I thought, this night is now for me. I have to enjoy. I know father will be alright. So I have fun. I played with my classmates even though it was very dark.
From just a distance, I can see my most admired guy in UP high. He is not kind and good. It’s just that he is very handsome- his face, his eyes, and his smile. It all makes him cute. Others don’t like him because he is naughty. But I don’t care. He is not that special to me.
Back to my friends, they made that night not just an ordinary night, instead, a special ones.
After Mr. Go’s lecture, we went back to the leader. Everybody was arguing and had a disagreement of what movie is to be watched first. My classmate was preparing the discs. She then said that we were going to watch the movie “Princess Hours”. We were so excited that we went near the TV screen. And so, it started. At that time, the second year students came and asked us to change the disc. They said that we were going to watch the movie entitled ‘Shutter’. We were all screaming when the show began. My friend, Janelle, comforted me for I was very scared. Then, a teacher came and told us to cut the show. We all went out. My friends told me that we will just stay in our site and talk with each other there. We bought something to eat in the middle of the night.
After, we all slept. It was already around 3:00 P.M when we had a nap.
At morning, they said “good morning” to me. We took some picture for the last 3 shots. Then, we went home.
And there I know, my friends all care for me. They are concern for me.
At night, I watch the stars. They all twinkle. I know they don’t just twinkle for me, instead, also for my friends. Every time I am starring at those stars, they are also gazing at them.

PRETENDING TO BE HAPPY!

It is hard to keep smiling if troubles are at hand. It is hard to feel alright, even though everything went wrong. Why is my life like this? Everything is cruel at me. Every time I go home from school, I think it is better not to go home. My parents always welcome me with their arguments. When I hear those words they say, I think it is hard for them to feed and provide our needs. “Why?” Is it because, they don’t have enough money to sustain our needs or it’s just because, they don’t have it at all? I just don’t mind their quarrellings. I just go to a corner and show to them that I am okay. At night time, I can’t sleep, thinking those words on my head. Everything is bothering me.
When I woke up in the morning, I right away rush going to the bathroom, eat breakfast, comb my hair, and fix myself for school. As I go out the house and close the door, I feel like a little bit better. Especially as I enter the school, and then I saw my friends- Janrey, Janelle, Jurrine, and Irene, I feel comfortable. I feel like I have no problem anymore. But it’s only what I think. When we are all together, we always share our insights.
When I face my friends, I show to them that I am happy, that I am alright. I act like I have no problem in the family. But deep inside me is a crying soul, a soul which needs the pure and instant laughter, a natural smile. ‘Yes’. It is true. It’s hard to act as a happy person if you aren’t really happy at all.
I think I have the entire problem in the world. Do you know? I really feel pity at my parents sometimes. I know they are doing everything for us and for my other siblings. There are times when they don’t have money for my baon. If I am not in the mood, I mock and blame them. But if I am, again and again, I say ‘it’s alright’.
Don’t you ever feel like this? The feeling wherein your heart is being crumpled? The feeling where devils are teasing you?
For my links and other acquaintances, I am happy at all times. Because they just see my outside face, the second me, the fake ones. I know they always see a natural smile from me, but it’s just on their own eyes. I feel shame when they see me crying because I have thousands of problems. I am afraid they can see the real me- the one who had the expression of grief.
Problems are surrounding me, and they all do not know that. My family is financially going down right now
Yes, my life is like this. There is too much to pretend. At times, I am happy, and occasionally I feel heartbreaking. But, I know, I am still very lucky, I have my family and my friends.

DAD or MOM?

Did somebody ever asked you, “who do you like more, your mom, or dad?”
For other people, they will say ‘both’. I think they don’t mean that question. Of course, it asking if who is better of the two choice or who of the two do you prefer more.
Actually, I am a daddy’s girl, but for me, I think I think I like my mom more. This doesn’t mean that I don’t want my dad. It’s just that there is something in my mom which is greater than my dad. For sure, there are many advantages and disadvantages for both of them.
My father loves to drink. He is now 42 years of age, but still he loves to be with those alcoholic liquors. He sometimes feel sick and I think it is because he drinks too much and too hard. At times, I got angry at him for the reason that he comes home very drunk.
My mom and dad are both working as a cargo forwarder. But for me, my mom works more. When we have the pay for the month, my father makes it a habit to ask 50% of it. This career is only our financial source. The part which given to my father goes to nothing. He has that bad habit, in Filipino term he has the ‘bisyo’. He doesn’t have any other women. It is just that he always give everything for his cock. Every time he has the money, he always goes to the cock fighting arenas an drop his money there. He is not the type of father that comes home very tired from work, and gives his pay to his wife. My father is not like that. He is different.
But I understand. He is really like that. I just wish that he would change that bad habit. I still love him very much. Nothing can replace him.
“Mother knows best” as what they say. Yes, I know. My mom knows everything best for our family. Even the house that we’re living in now- it’s all because of her. Because of all her effort just to stand our very own house, she makes me believed that she is the breadwinner in the family. She even does everything- washing our clothes, cleaning the plates, and all the household errands. There are times when I got angry at her. But then I realize she is very right. Everything is alright if my mom is there. She knows what her kids want and what they don’t.
That is why I choose my mom more than my dad. But you know what, I am very proud to have a father like him. Life without him is impossible for me. Even my mom, she is truly my life. My parents are both very special for me. I love them. Nothing can replace them in my heart. They are everything need to live in this world. I love my mom and dad very much.
How about you? Which do you prefer- your mom or dad?